I would like all of you who hear the internal dialogue to think about something as a possibility.
Imagine that when we are altered in consciousness what actually happens is that our individual boundaries are temporarily dissolved.
Suppose that what we have been hearing is actually each other, all over space/time, on a universal level of existence. (Come on; humour me for a little bit here)
If that is the case, then we would have to deal with that in a different way wouldn’t we, since all any of us say or do would be directly affecting everyone else in that space.
Holding that as your premise of reasoning then let’s begin from that point. (If you have trouble accepting this as possible, just do it ‘as if’, you believed it.) I would like you to think about this experience which the majority of hearers seem to have:
Some hearers are terribly frightened by being yelled at and called evil by some of the voices. Vices yell at them to ‘get out’ or to kill themselves. They may be told that God will not forgive them or that they are going to ‘burn in hell.’
Still others tell us that they deal with the voices in their space by suggesting to them that they go and kill themselves, or they yell at THEM to ‘get out’ and they tell them THEY are evil and that God will punish them.
If we were in fact, telepathic or psychic, or having an out of body experience, that we did not understand we were having, and did not know how to control, what might that mean for all of us?
What if both of the above hearers were only dealing with each other but did not know that or understand that?
Wouldn’t we then be making all of this even worse by handling it the way we were?
What would happen if we took the “Golden Rule” into the collective inner space with us and with self focus practiced the principle of mutual respect instead? How fast and how much could we change the quality of that experience if we did?
I believe that whether you think I am ‘crazy’ or not, that we must all try to do exactly that.
All ‘the voices’ yours, mine, ours, must respect, honour, explain and support the collective experience to all the other voices.
As I once said to the ‘others’, “it is just us we hear. We are, or can be, the best support group the world has ever known. Nobody understands it better than those who have gone through it.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
The Alternate Reality Created
Which then Defines the Target as ‘Crazy’
By Patricia Lefave, Labelled, D.D.(P)
First Posted September 2006
Let’s keep it simple. This is the ‘crazy’ target’s perception of the group.
One day, two siblings are playing outside. I will call these two ‘Apple’ and ‘Banana.’
Apple is extremely jealous of Banana, who is the younger of the two, for taking the family attention away from Apple. This jealousy however, is a secret. Apple being older has been given power over Banana. When they are outside together, Apple orders Banana to cross the street and wait there on the sidewalk. Banana does as told.
Then, Apple goes directly into the house and tells one of their parents that Banana has crossed the street, even though Apple told Banana NOT to do that.
The parent goes immediately to the door and yells at Banana to get in the house right that minute. Once there, Banana is asked by the parent to explain why she crossed the street. Banana explains as asked. After she tells the story of why, her parent yells, Liar! Why would Apple tell you to do such a thing? That makes no sense. You are just trying to cause problems for poor Apple!’
(here, the targeted child is expected to supply a ‘logical’ reason as to why Apple has done what he has done. If the targeted child can NOT come up with a ‘logical’ reason, this is intended to ‘prove’ to the target, and everyone else, that Apple could not have done this, therefore, Banana must be guilty of targeting Apple by accusing him 'falsely'.)
Banana tries to assure the parent that she is telling the truth, while Apple’s eyes glow with amusement and a little smirk appears on his face. Banana has become aware that Apple is happy about causing the parent to believe the lie and finding the fault to be in Banana for telling the truth. So, Banana tries to tell the parent what Apple is really doing. The parent still does not believe Banana and starts to holler even more at Banana about what an awful liar she is. Reality has become the opposite and KNOWING that, Banana begins to cry out of fear, confusion and frustration.
The parent then mocks Banana and says the crying is nothing but a bid for attention, which will not work, and if Banana doesn’t STOP that fake crying, the parent will REALLY give Banana something to cry about!
Banana now knows that she is in a power struggle with Apple, that she is alone in it, and that if she doesn’t manage to get the parent to believe the truth, Apple will keep right on attacking her like this. She also knows that if she keeps trying to tell the parent who does not believe her, the same truth, the parent will also keep attacking her for continuing to try. She feels caught betwen the proverbial rock and the hard place.
This is the starting point of what is to become, the twisted family dynamic. It is going to grow much larger and more complex, and the rest of the family will all be involved based upon this reversal of reality. In the near future, they will involve many others outside the immediate family as well.
All involved will focus on Banana’s supposed perception/reaction problems and will try to ‘break’ her of her ‘attention seeking’ behaviors, by mocking, ridiculing, smirking at her frustration and reactions, punishing, invalidating and isolating her. They will do this consistently every time she tries to get help, or ‘complains’ about her role in the family.
In time, those observing her reactions to them, will find her attempts to resolve her problems with them ‘amusing’ and it will all show on their faces and in their eyes, though most of them will be unaware of HER awareness of THEM. They will remain determined to ‘break’ her of her ‘story telling’ and her ‘whining and complaining’. They are going to ‘succeed’ in this by the time she is sixteen when she will finally break down, as could have been predicted, under the non stop pressure and invalidation, unable to make any sense of her own position as target for the whole group.
She will then be diagnosed as ‘schizophrenic’ by the psychiatrist who will view the psychosis as merely a ‘psychotic episode’ within the parameters of a ‘disease’ process.’ He will arrive at this diagnosis BECAUSE she explains her life experience to him, just as it happened. Covertly, of course, he will get the family group’s version, explaining it all as just the opposite. The psychiatrist will hear it all in just the terms in which he has been taught to hear it. After all, it wouldn’t be ‘reasonable’ for a family to behave in the way Banana ‘claims’ they do. The family members seem very sincere to him.
Except for one of them, the family IS sincere about their beliefs about both Banana and Apple. Perfectly sincere. They are also wrong. They have had it backward, right from the start, but they still don’t know that. Only Banana and Apple know that.
At the hospital, while visiting Banana, Apple is smilingwith satisfaction. No one is EVER going to take the positive attention away from Apple. Apple has won the ‘contest’ the rest of the family does not even know has existed. The ‘contest’ is about a hidden agenda of domination and submission.
If you look back to the beginning of it all, so long ago now, and look to understand EVERYONE’S thinking and behavior in this, based upon what they each BELIEVE to be true, then look at it again a second time based on what is actually true, you will see and understand the split reality which is created by just one person with no conscience and a hidden agenda. It must be understood though with an ‘overview’ meaning looking at all sides of this, not just one. To DO that, put yourself in each of the roles described based on what each person in them believes to be true and not what IS true. It is only by seeing the whole GROUP dynamic that it can be understood, escaped and changed.
If you who are cast in the role of ‘Bananas’ understand first that Apple’s behavior doesn’t really have anything at all to do with YOUR understanding, or your value as a human being, you will begin to get out of the psycho spiritual trap on your own, whether anyone else around you understands it or not. You won’t be able to convince others of the truth they don’t want to know.
Really understanding your protagonist and the reason WHY the groups who get involved behave the way they do, will allow you to detach from the sick relationship because you will no longer be searching for the answers needed to solve your personal puzzle.
You must know with all your heart, mind and soul that the ‘Apples” of the world do what they do because of their own self delusion and grandiosity. The fact that most people don’t see the “Apples” for what they are doesn’t change the truth of that. In fact, maybe ‘schizophrenia’ tends to run in some families because the “Apples” don’t fall far from the family tree which produced them. They are reinforced in their delusions by the failure of most others to see it for what it is.
It’s really not that complicated but resolving this is going to mean facing some very unpleasant truths about families and society in general. It will mean that humanity’s willingness, and sometimes even joyful, participation in destroying the lives and minds of it’s scapegoats, will have to be understood and faced as a current necessity in maintaining the DENIAL of the shameful truth. Scapegoating is designed to defend and maintain this very common group dynamic. It happens a lot more often than most people will ever care to know. This is the true nature of dysfunctional Pi.
ONCAmar09
By Patricia Lefave, Labelled, D.D.(P)
First Posted September 2006
Let’s keep it simple. This is the ‘crazy’ target’s perception of the group.
One day, two siblings are playing outside. I will call these two ‘Apple’ and ‘Banana.’
Apple is extremely jealous of Banana, who is the younger of the two, for taking the family attention away from Apple. This jealousy however, is a secret. Apple being older has been given power over Banana. When they are outside together, Apple orders Banana to cross the street and wait there on the sidewalk. Banana does as told.
Then, Apple goes directly into the house and tells one of their parents that Banana has crossed the street, even though Apple told Banana NOT to do that.
The parent goes immediately to the door and yells at Banana to get in the house right that minute. Once there, Banana is asked by the parent to explain why she crossed the street. Banana explains as asked. After she tells the story of why, her parent yells, Liar! Why would Apple tell you to do such a thing? That makes no sense. You are just trying to cause problems for poor Apple!’
(here, the targeted child is expected to supply a ‘logical’ reason as to why Apple has done what he has done. If the targeted child can NOT come up with a ‘logical’ reason, this is intended to ‘prove’ to the target, and everyone else, that Apple could not have done this, therefore, Banana must be guilty of targeting Apple by accusing him 'falsely'.)
Banana tries to assure the parent that she is telling the truth, while Apple’s eyes glow with amusement and a little smirk appears on his face. Banana has become aware that Apple is happy about causing the parent to believe the lie and finding the fault to be in Banana for telling the truth. So, Banana tries to tell the parent what Apple is really doing. The parent still does not believe Banana and starts to holler even more at Banana about what an awful liar she is. Reality has become the opposite and KNOWING that, Banana begins to cry out of fear, confusion and frustration.
The parent then mocks Banana and says the crying is nothing but a bid for attention, which will not work, and if Banana doesn’t STOP that fake crying, the parent will REALLY give Banana something to cry about!
Banana now knows that she is in a power struggle with Apple, that she is alone in it, and that if she doesn’t manage to get the parent to believe the truth, Apple will keep right on attacking her like this. She also knows that if she keeps trying to tell the parent who does not believe her, the same truth, the parent will also keep attacking her for continuing to try. She feels caught betwen the proverbial rock and the hard place.
This is the starting point of what is to become, the twisted family dynamic. It is going to grow much larger and more complex, and the rest of the family will all be involved based upon this reversal of reality. In the near future, they will involve many others outside the immediate family as well.
All involved will focus on Banana’s supposed perception/reaction problems and will try to ‘break’ her of her ‘attention seeking’ behaviors, by mocking, ridiculing, smirking at her frustration and reactions, punishing, invalidating and isolating her. They will do this consistently every time she tries to get help, or ‘complains’ about her role in the family.
In time, those observing her reactions to them, will find her attempts to resolve her problems with them ‘amusing’ and it will all show on their faces and in their eyes, though most of them will be unaware of HER awareness of THEM. They will remain determined to ‘break’ her of her ‘story telling’ and her ‘whining and complaining’. They are going to ‘succeed’ in this by the time she is sixteen when she will finally break down, as could have been predicted, under the non stop pressure and invalidation, unable to make any sense of her own position as target for the whole group.
She will then be diagnosed as ‘schizophrenic’ by the psychiatrist who will view the psychosis as merely a ‘psychotic episode’ within the parameters of a ‘disease’ process.’ He will arrive at this diagnosis BECAUSE she explains her life experience to him, just as it happened. Covertly, of course, he will get the family group’s version, explaining it all as just the opposite. The psychiatrist will hear it all in just the terms in which he has been taught to hear it. After all, it wouldn’t be ‘reasonable’ for a family to behave in the way Banana ‘claims’ they do. The family members seem very sincere to him.
Except for one of them, the family IS sincere about their beliefs about both Banana and Apple. Perfectly sincere. They are also wrong. They have had it backward, right from the start, but they still don’t know that. Only Banana and Apple know that.
At the hospital, while visiting Banana, Apple is smilingwith satisfaction. No one is EVER going to take the positive attention away from Apple. Apple has won the ‘contest’ the rest of the family does not even know has existed. The ‘contest’ is about a hidden agenda of domination and submission.
If you look back to the beginning of it all, so long ago now, and look to understand EVERYONE’S thinking and behavior in this, based upon what they each BELIEVE to be true, then look at it again a second time based on what is actually true, you will see and understand the split reality which is created by just one person with no conscience and a hidden agenda. It must be understood though with an ‘overview’ meaning looking at all sides of this, not just one. To DO that, put yourself in each of the roles described based on what each person in them believes to be true and not what IS true. It is only by seeing the whole GROUP dynamic that it can be understood, escaped and changed.
If you who are cast in the role of ‘Bananas’ understand first that Apple’s behavior doesn’t really have anything at all to do with YOUR understanding, or your value as a human being, you will begin to get out of the psycho spiritual trap on your own, whether anyone else around you understands it or not. You won’t be able to convince others of the truth they don’t want to know.
Really understanding your protagonist and the reason WHY the groups who get involved behave the way they do, will allow you to detach from the sick relationship because you will no longer be searching for the answers needed to solve your personal puzzle.
You must know with all your heart, mind and soul that the ‘Apples” of the world do what they do because of their own self delusion and grandiosity. The fact that most people don’t see the “Apples” for what they are doesn’t change the truth of that. In fact, maybe ‘schizophrenia’ tends to run in some families because the “Apples” don’t fall far from the family tree which produced them. They are reinforced in their delusions by the failure of most others to see it for what it is.
It’s really not that complicated but resolving this is going to mean facing some very unpleasant truths about families and society in general. It will mean that humanity’s willingness, and sometimes even joyful, participation in destroying the lives and minds of it’s scapegoats, will have to be understood and faced as a current necessity in maintaining the DENIAL of the shameful truth. Scapegoating is designed to defend and maintain this very common group dynamic. It happens a lot more often than most people will ever care to know. This is the true nature of dysfunctional Pi.
ONCAmar09
Saturday, March 21, 2009
The Bare Bones of My Experience
First posted in Sept. 2006
By Patricia Lefave, Labelled, D.D.(P)
This is the ‘play’ of my experience upon which all the rest of the community has attached itself to ‘flesh’ it out for me.
A protagonist spots me as his target. He ‘sets me up’ by splitting reality in two; one version for me and an opposite version for the group with whom he works. Both ‘sides’ (me and the group) get our respective versions of reality from him, delivered ‘covertly.’ As he keeps baiting me with supposedly ‘mutual’ interests, who also keeps asking them for their opinions about what is going on with me and what THEY think is happening. They begin to subjectively project their own opinions and ideas into the suitably abstract explanations provided for them by him, as shown in his training in this well planned chaos.
My protagonist is well aware of what is happening, and WHY, as he planned it based on his previous experience of it, for which he paid several hundred dollars. He is also aware of its very predictable effects for that reason. So, h remains vague and abstract so that he can’t be pinned down concretely, and assumes a ‘listening’ mode with his co-workers as they try to figure out what it all means. He encourages the group, vaguely of course, to help him attack his targeted victim. Of course it is presented by him as ‘help’ not an assault.
He watches the action between ‘the two sides’ (victim and group) who are being played off by him against each other. Once he gets the group chaos going, he then pulls out and refuses to talk directly to me about what is going on, no matter what I say. Though he was the original ‘source’ of the action, the group has never taken over on his behalf. This gives him a rush of ‘secret’ power which satisfies his aggressive impulses and his need for ‘infantile, narcissistic omnipotence.’ (His love of being an a**hole)
By the time either his victim (me), or the group (his co-workers as well as all the people THEY have now involved) realize all is not what it may seem, the damage, to his victim and potentially to the group, is already done. So, the group makes the decision to conceal their behavior, close ranks, and protects itself against any negative outcomes.
Because they make the choice to take care of their own interests and deny the whole event, rather than to find the truth and solve the problem, the victim (me) gets told she is ‘crazy’ if she thinks anything happened. To make the assessment official I get my very own psychiatric label, Delusional Disorder, (Paranoid), non compliant and without prospect of recovery (unless drugged into submission of course) and this is then passed along to my employer as I am to be kept from working for a full year. (For complaining that I was set up and abused)
The chaos created (disorder) has been officially pronounced to be neatly contained within me, with no relation to concrete reality whatsoever. In fact, I hear through the gossip mongers grapevine that they had planned to try to make me think I imagined the whole thing as they ‘did not want to open a can of worms.’ Since all the responsibility for this non existent event has now been handed to me as my ‘perception/reaction’ problem, everyone else involved can get him/herself off the hook by hanging me on it to take any and all losses for them in their place. Some of them told me how important their own jobs were to them when I asked them for concrete help as a way of trying to ‘explain’ why they would not stick their necks out.
After this of course, the losses just keep growing and the more I protest the greater the community punishment for doing so. Fighting to bring the truth out into the open has been an exercise in futility and much like talking to the Walls. (see my Box blog essays; Talking To the Walls”)
Those who have supported this and suppressed the evidence deliver speeches on ‘Ethics’ and are in an unquestioned authoritarian role designed to determine, legally, the nature of reality itself, even though they know what the group did, even if they did NOT know at the time, that it was a deliberately planned attack. The ‘reality’ that can be dictated to me, can be dictated to all of you, also.
What of my protagonist who planned this from the start?
He’s bee well protected by the group he manipulated, just as he expected he would be. When he has been sure no one else sees him except me, that little smirk appears on his face and his eyes glow with amused ‘satisfaction’ because he knows that he and I both understand the same thing about what has happened here. It is the rest of you who just don’t ‘get it.’ ‘We’ understand that this outcome was planned and expected, that I now know his intent and HOW he did it, but that because he claimed the opposite, right from the tart, no one will believe me and I am not expected to have any CONCRETE proof that he intended to do anything at all. There were, however, a few errors made by him and a few things he did not anticipate.
Mostly though, this is a ‘secret’ which only he and I share. It gives him ‘satisfaction’ to share this secret with me; the secret understanding that he is the ‘winner’ and I am the ‘loser’ in this ‘game of life.’ He has given me the UNDER standing (abstract AND concrete) in a Zen-like cuteness, which he fully intended me to have. Now he sees himself as in total control of everything that happens to him and sees me in the opposite role of being totally controlled. This is the choice he was told he was making in his secret training. It’s about domination.
This ‘master plan’ is used by all domination types (though it isn’t always so formalized as this one) including the autocrats in some (not ALL or NO) families. Just like in my protagonist’s dysfunctional group here, it is also alive and well in other groups like schools, workplaces, and even public transportation rider ship. Such groups start by making the assumption that the aggressor is being ‘falsely’ accused by a victim who is just SAYING something happened to ‘seek attention.’ After that, reality will be seen, heard and judged as it’s opposite.
That is how many victims’ complaints of abuse are magically transformed into ‘symptoms’ of ‘mental illness’ instead of facts of the person’s actual experience at the hands of a group of others. These are ‘others’ who can never be blamed for anything. As my protagonist would put it to those ‘others,’ “it’s about your righteousness.” When the aggressor is a sociopath, he or she has no problem with this outcome and is, in fact, likely to have his/her own delusions of infantile omnipotence reinforced by the group blindness to it.
This sort of event is also why many family members seem so sincere in their beliefs about the identified patient’s reality. They ARE sincere. Sometimes, (not always or never) even the identified patient cannot identify the protagonist who started the routine. Usually, even when he or she can identify the protagonist, it gets invalidated anyway by the protagonist, the group blindly supporting the switch, and psychiatry itself.
There is no greater a psycho spiritually isolated position to be forced into than this one. There is nothing more mind, soul, and eventually body destroying experience than this. It can be the greatest feeling of utter helplessness and hopelessness that anyone can imagine. (in my protagonist’s training, help and hope are two of the stated desires I am to leave behind me) yet while all of this is happening, most other people involved in it are smiling, joking, mocking and ridiculing with great abandon, directed at the victim, who is most often judged to be ‘unconscious’, stupid and the truly ‘evil’ one of the original pair.
‘Reason’ has nothing whatsoever to do with the protagonist’s motivation and goal or with the group phenomenon It causes. When an individual sees him/herself as ‘superior’ to others, that one also feels ‘entitled’ by that ‘superiority’ to do anything he/she likes that will validate that delusion. He/she ‘validates himself by invalidating the other point of view.’ Such people as these do not have any need for a conscience as they already ‘know’ they are perfect, like God, therefore anyone’s perception or reactions that DON’T validate that, MUST be invalidated to maintain their OWN position. From such a delusion of certainty, that is done automatically, spontaneously and without any thought at all.
This ‘lesson’ is a demonstration by my protagonist about the power of being ‘unreasonable,’ achieved by deluding himself that turning reality around on hundred and eighty degrees to get his own way, is a HIGHER level of consciousness. This, in his opinion, makes him the ‘winner’ in the game of life.’
Now you tell me, what does that make the REST of you who have supported, and continue to support, him, and ‘It,’ for all these years?
You know, if you just think about this using my own case as the model, for which I have concrete evidence, it just might occur to you (like a revelation) why it is that SOME family members (not ALL and not NONE) promote the idea of ‘mental illness’ as a disease contained within the relative COMPLAINING of abuse. It might also occur to you why the rest of the family supports it without question. Many of the family members are SINCERE in their beliefs, in part, because they don’t see the truth sometimes and also because psychiatrists are also sincere in THEIR beliefs about what is really going on. As is said in my own protagonist’s training which I believe was heard by HIM as an instruction for power, “you think you know things because you believe them.’
As Peter Breggin. M.D. has said, if you believe there’s a disease, then what psychiatrists say and do SEEMS logical. But if there IS no ‘disease, then….’
As Thomas Szasz says, ‘It’s about a hidden agenda of domination and submission.’
I do not HAVE a ‘mental illness.’ I DID have a schizophrenic type REACTION to being set up and assaulted by an a**hole whose goal was domination and control as is shown in his training from which he was quoting on paper. He wants to be ‘at cause’ and not ‘at effect’ like me and also like all the rest of you. You resolve this by LETTING him have exactly what he wants.
Unless you are all in comas the parallel of my experience here to that of others saying the same things, should be jumping off the page at you.
I am not the cause. (Bubbling up from within a defective brain)
I am the effect. ( of group insanity bubbling forth)
I am not the aggressor.
I am the victim.
This is a very common experience shared by many, many others.
You don’t get it because you bought into the bait and switch as ‘reality.’ In fact, you didn’t even notice it happening probably because blaming those who ‘whine bitch and complain’ about being abused by others has become the acceptable ‘norm’ for most of you. You don’t see what you don’t question and what you don’t see, you can’t ‘fix.’ Now read everything I already told you with that switch in mind and see how you hear the very same words NOW.
RPT: 1 Mar 2009
By Patricia Lefave, Labelled, D.D.(P)
This is the ‘play’ of my experience upon which all the rest of the community has attached itself to ‘flesh’ it out for me.
A protagonist spots me as his target. He ‘sets me up’ by splitting reality in two; one version for me and an opposite version for the group with whom he works. Both ‘sides’ (me and the group) get our respective versions of reality from him, delivered ‘covertly.’ As he keeps baiting me with supposedly ‘mutual’ interests, who also keeps asking them for their opinions about what is going on with me and what THEY think is happening. They begin to subjectively project their own opinions and ideas into the suitably abstract explanations provided for them by him, as shown in his training in this well planned chaos.
My protagonist is well aware of what is happening, and WHY, as he planned it based on his previous experience of it, for which he paid several hundred dollars. He is also aware of its very predictable effects for that reason. So, h remains vague and abstract so that he can’t be pinned down concretely, and assumes a ‘listening’ mode with his co-workers as they try to figure out what it all means. He encourages the group, vaguely of course, to help him attack his targeted victim. Of course it is presented by him as ‘help’ not an assault.
He watches the action between ‘the two sides’ (victim and group) who are being played off by him against each other. Once he gets the group chaos going, he then pulls out and refuses to talk directly to me about what is going on, no matter what I say. Though he was the original ‘source’ of the action, the group has never taken over on his behalf. This gives him a rush of ‘secret’ power which satisfies his aggressive impulses and his need for ‘infantile, narcissistic omnipotence.’ (His love of being an a**hole)
By the time either his victim (me), or the group (his co-workers as well as all the people THEY have now involved) realize all is not what it may seem, the damage, to his victim and potentially to the group, is already done. So, the group makes the decision to conceal their behavior, close ranks, and protects itself against any negative outcomes.
Because they make the choice to take care of their own interests and deny the whole event, rather than to find the truth and solve the problem, the victim (me) gets told she is ‘crazy’ if she thinks anything happened. To make the assessment official I get my very own psychiatric label, Delusional Disorder, (Paranoid), non compliant and without prospect of recovery (unless drugged into submission of course) and this is then passed along to my employer as I am to be kept from working for a full year. (For complaining that I was set up and abused)
The chaos created (disorder) has been officially pronounced to be neatly contained within me, with no relation to concrete reality whatsoever. In fact, I hear through the gossip mongers grapevine that they had planned to try to make me think I imagined the whole thing as they ‘did not want to open a can of worms.’ Since all the responsibility for this non existent event has now been handed to me as my ‘perception/reaction’ problem, everyone else involved can get him/herself off the hook by hanging me on it to take any and all losses for them in their place. Some of them told me how important their own jobs were to them when I asked them for concrete help as a way of trying to ‘explain’ why they would not stick their necks out.
After this of course, the losses just keep growing and the more I protest the greater the community punishment for doing so. Fighting to bring the truth out into the open has been an exercise in futility and much like talking to the Walls. (see my Box blog essays; Talking To the Walls”)
Those who have supported this and suppressed the evidence deliver speeches on ‘Ethics’ and are in an unquestioned authoritarian role designed to determine, legally, the nature of reality itself, even though they know what the group did, even if they did NOT know at the time, that it was a deliberately planned attack. The ‘reality’ that can be dictated to me, can be dictated to all of you, also.
What of my protagonist who planned this from the start?
He’s bee well protected by the group he manipulated, just as he expected he would be. When he has been sure no one else sees him except me, that little smirk appears on his face and his eyes glow with amused ‘satisfaction’ because he knows that he and I both understand the same thing about what has happened here. It is the rest of you who just don’t ‘get it.’ ‘We’ understand that this outcome was planned and expected, that I now know his intent and HOW he did it, but that because he claimed the opposite, right from the tart, no one will believe me and I am not expected to have any CONCRETE proof that he intended to do anything at all. There were, however, a few errors made by him and a few things he did not anticipate.
Mostly though, this is a ‘secret’ which only he and I share. It gives him ‘satisfaction’ to share this secret with me; the secret understanding that he is the ‘winner’ and I am the ‘loser’ in this ‘game of life.’ He has given me the UNDER standing (abstract AND concrete) in a Zen-like cuteness, which he fully intended me to have. Now he sees himself as in total control of everything that happens to him and sees me in the opposite role of being totally controlled. This is the choice he was told he was making in his secret training. It’s about domination.
This ‘master plan’ is used by all domination types (though it isn’t always so formalized as this one) including the autocrats in some (not ALL or NO) families. Just like in my protagonist’s dysfunctional group here, it is also alive and well in other groups like schools, workplaces, and even public transportation rider ship. Such groups start by making the assumption that the aggressor is being ‘falsely’ accused by a victim who is just SAYING something happened to ‘seek attention.’ After that, reality will be seen, heard and judged as it’s opposite.
That is how many victims’ complaints of abuse are magically transformed into ‘symptoms’ of ‘mental illness’ instead of facts of the person’s actual experience at the hands of a group of others. These are ‘others’ who can never be blamed for anything. As my protagonist would put it to those ‘others,’ “it’s about your righteousness.” When the aggressor is a sociopath, he or she has no problem with this outcome and is, in fact, likely to have his/her own delusions of infantile omnipotence reinforced by the group blindness to it.
This sort of event is also why many family members seem so sincere in their beliefs about the identified patient’s reality. They ARE sincere. Sometimes, (not always or never) even the identified patient cannot identify the protagonist who started the routine. Usually, even when he or she can identify the protagonist, it gets invalidated anyway by the protagonist, the group blindly supporting the switch, and psychiatry itself.
There is no greater a psycho spiritually isolated position to be forced into than this one. There is nothing more mind, soul, and eventually body destroying experience than this. It can be the greatest feeling of utter helplessness and hopelessness that anyone can imagine. (in my protagonist’s training, help and hope are two of the stated desires I am to leave behind me) yet while all of this is happening, most other people involved in it are smiling, joking, mocking and ridiculing with great abandon, directed at the victim, who is most often judged to be ‘unconscious’, stupid and the truly ‘evil’ one of the original pair.
‘Reason’ has nothing whatsoever to do with the protagonist’s motivation and goal or with the group phenomenon It causes. When an individual sees him/herself as ‘superior’ to others, that one also feels ‘entitled’ by that ‘superiority’ to do anything he/she likes that will validate that delusion. He/she ‘validates himself by invalidating the other point of view.’ Such people as these do not have any need for a conscience as they already ‘know’ they are perfect, like God, therefore anyone’s perception or reactions that DON’T validate that, MUST be invalidated to maintain their OWN position. From such a delusion of certainty, that is done automatically, spontaneously and without any thought at all.
This ‘lesson’ is a demonstration by my protagonist about the power of being ‘unreasonable,’ achieved by deluding himself that turning reality around on hundred and eighty degrees to get his own way, is a HIGHER level of consciousness. This, in his opinion, makes him the ‘winner’ in the game of life.’
Now you tell me, what does that make the REST of you who have supported, and continue to support, him, and ‘It,’ for all these years?
You know, if you just think about this using my own case as the model, for which I have concrete evidence, it just might occur to you (like a revelation) why it is that SOME family members (not ALL and not NONE) promote the idea of ‘mental illness’ as a disease contained within the relative COMPLAINING of abuse. It might also occur to you why the rest of the family supports it without question. Many of the family members are SINCERE in their beliefs, in part, because they don’t see the truth sometimes and also because psychiatrists are also sincere in THEIR beliefs about what is really going on. As is said in my own protagonist’s training which I believe was heard by HIM as an instruction for power, “you think you know things because you believe them.’
As Peter Breggin. M.D. has said, if you believe there’s a disease, then what psychiatrists say and do SEEMS logical. But if there IS no ‘disease, then….’
As Thomas Szasz says, ‘It’s about a hidden agenda of domination and submission.’
I do not HAVE a ‘mental illness.’ I DID have a schizophrenic type REACTION to being set up and assaulted by an a**hole whose goal was domination and control as is shown in his training from which he was quoting on paper. He wants to be ‘at cause’ and not ‘at effect’ like me and also like all the rest of you. You resolve this by LETTING him have exactly what he wants.
Unless you are all in comas the parallel of my experience here to that of others saying the same things, should be jumping off the page at you.
I am not the cause. (Bubbling up from within a defective brain)
I am the effect. ( of group insanity bubbling forth)
I am not the aggressor.
I am the victim.
This is a very common experience shared by many, many others.
You don’t get it because you bought into the bait and switch as ‘reality.’ In fact, you didn’t even notice it happening probably because blaming those who ‘whine bitch and complain’ about being abused by others has become the acceptable ‘norm’ for most of you. You don’t see what you don’t question and what you don’t see, you can’t ‘fix.’ Now read everything I already told you with that switch in mind and see how you hear the very same words NOW.
RPT: 1 Mar 2009
Monday, February 16, 2009
What Do Words Really Mean?
First Posted August 2006
I think it IS a communication problem.
Here is an example of how the SAME words can have opposite meaning, depending upon the speaker’s point of view and ALSO upon the point of view of the one who is hearing them.
“You don’t reveal the contents of your training to outsiders or others as it will only confuse them.”
This is a statement at the abstract nexus of meaning. What it means, exactly, depends upon a number of things about what is understood.
Is it a negative or a positive statement?
If the speaker’s intentions are to clarify meaning, then the statement is contradictory in content, since offering enough information on a subject doesn’t cause confusion for others, it clears up confusion.
However, if the speaker’s intentions are to confuse others, then it makes sense to withhold information in order to achieve that goal doesn’t’ it?
On the other side of that transaction is the listener.
How does the listener hear those same words? If the listener is looking for resolution for both self and others, then the statement won’t seem to make any sense. But, what if the listener is motivated by a twisted desire for power and control over others as a way of making himself feel good?What do the same words mean then?
Is the same statement an accusation, a revelation or an instruction? Does it depend upon your current understanding, your motivation, your character and your personal goals?
I think that it does and I also think that it is important to see this sort of thing from outside it, rather than try to find concrete meaning in it applied equally to all, based upon any individual’s point of view. There IS a meaning on the level of abstract meaning but it does depend upon the point of view. The point of view needed to see it as an abstract dynamic is the overview. We cannot take our own concrete experience and turn those details into an abstract truth which applies to all.
It is a Quantum leap from one to the other.
This nexus of meaning is a communication paradox the psychiatrized are caught up in all the time. The psychiatrists actually don’t understand it any better than the psychiatrized. In fact, most psychiatrized understand it better, but we don’t get heard. We get silenced.
More often then not, that happens the minute after the label is applied. Nothing says, ‘invalidate this person’ faster than the label that signals virtually everyone to do just that.
After that, life’s meaning is supplied FOR us, often by force, by those who are certain that they know what they in fact, don’t understand at all. You might say, they think they know things simply because they believe them.You might also say that if you want to REALLY communicate and get some REAL understanding, the first question you need to ask is, exactly WHICH ‘things’ do you believe you know?When people believe that they already understand something, all further search for the truth and resolution stops doesn’t it?Psychiatrists need to understand the whole thing, including the part THEY are playing in keeping the whole mess going. They are not ‘outside’ this problem as ‘objective observers’ as they like to believe they are.
“Mental illness’ of this kind is about a GROUP dynamic and the group is just as ‘ill’ if not more ‘ill’ than the identified patient, who is often the target of the whole group. This dynamic creates chaos on a non linear level that grows exponentially by chain reaction. (like fission) Rather than by accepting this as an ‘’illness’’ neatly located within the targeted ‘patient’ the cure will only be found by clarification of both personal and collective MEANING.
Equality of worth is the path to understanding and real understanding is the psycho spiritual cure. It is the metaphysical level that must be understood. We cannot 'cure' a metaphysical illness by physical means.
I think it IS a communication problem.
Here is an example of how the SAME words can have opposite meaning, depending upon the speaker’s point of view and ALSO upon the point of view of the one who is hearing them.
“You don’t reveal the contents of your training to outsiders or others as it will only confuse them.”
This is a statement at the abstract nexus of meaning. What it means, exactly, depends upon a number of things about what is understood.
Is it a negative or a positive statement?
If the speaker’s intentions are to clarify meaning, then the statement is contradictory in content, since offering enough information on a subject doesn’t cause confusion for others, it clears up confusion.
However, if the speaker’s intentions are to confuse others, then it makes sense to withhold information in order to achieve that goal doesn’t’ it?
On the other side of that transaction is the listener.
How does the listener hear those same words? If the listener is looking for resolution for both self and others, then the statement won’t seem to make any sense. But, what if the listener is motivated by a twisted desire for power and control over others as a way of making himself feel good?What do the same words mean then?
Is the same statement an accusation, a revelation or an instruction? Does it depend upon your current understanding, your motivation, your character and your personal goals?
I think that it does and I also think that it is important to see this sort of thing from outside it, rather than try to find concrete meaning in it applied equally to all, based upon any individual’s point of view. There IS a meaning on the level of abstract meaning but it does depend upon the point of view. The point of view needed to see it as an abstract dynamic is the overview. We cannot take our own concrete experience and turn those details into an abstract truth which applies to all.
It is a Quantum leap from one to the other.
This nexus of meaning is a communication paradox the psychiatrized are caught up in all the time. The psychiatrists actually don’t understand it any better than the psychiatrized. In fact, most psychiatrized understand it better, but we don’t get heard. We get silenced.
More often then not, that happens the minute after the label is applied. Nothing says, ‘invalidate this person’ faster than the label that signals virtually everyone to do just that.
After that, life’s meaning is supplied FOR us, often by force, by those who are certain that they know what they in fact, don’t understand at all. You might say, they think they know things simply because they believe them.You might also say that if you want to REALLY communicate and get some REAL understanding, the first question you need to ask is, exactly WHICH ‘things’ do you believe you know?When people believe that they already understand something, all further search for the truth and resolution stops doesn’t it?Psychiatrists need to understand the whole thing, including the part THEY are playing in keeping the whole mess going. They are not ‘outside’ this problem as ‘objective observers’ as they like to believe they are.
“Mental illness’ of this kind is about a GROUP dynamic and the group is just as ‘ill’ if not more ‘ill’ than the identified patient, who is often the target of the whole group. This dynamic creates chaos on a non linear level that grows exponentially by chain reaction. (like fission) Rather than by accepting this as an ‘’illness’’ neatly located within the targeted ‘patient’ the cure will only be found by clarification of both personal and collective MEANING.
Equality of worth is the path to understanding and real understanding is the psycho spiritual cure. It is the metaphysical level that must be understood. We cannot 'cure' a metaphysical illness by physical means.
RT:1 Feb 2009
Sunday, February 01, 2009
Communities Acting Out
First posted in July, 2006
…is pretty much more of the same of course. But I can never get over the people who can keep right on acting this out the same way, year after year, after year, while consistently failing to make a connection between themselves and their incessant gossiping, and my reporting of all the various versions of it being acted out for me, followed by the denial of it and the claim that all I hear from them, originates within my own mind. It really is mind-boggling and almost impossible to decipher. Yet the system expects children to be able to explain this group phenomenon and if they CAN’T, the fact that they can’t is used as ‘proof’ by the system that it couldn’t have happened.
They never figure out that this circular argument which was invented as the means of the denial of any reality that people don’t like, is the CAUSE of the individual’s confusion in the first place. Even when there is a ton of evidence they cling tightly to their belief that they are ‘hidden’ in plain sight and therefore ‘superior’ to those they decide are unable to see them.
Original post at Meshuggah.net
Yesterday, these two women discussed how I ‘think that ‘he’ wanted to marry me’. I have heard all the same rumors that they have and many more besides, but when they hear them they are rumors and when I hear them they are defined as ‘delusions.’ The SAME stories mind you are given these opposite meanings still.
The other thing they like to do is always credit me as the ‘source’ of the ideas when in fact, I am no more in the story of me than a prop is ‘in’ a staged play.
So. yesterday, these two passed along the latest and one of them even confirmed that for me by pointing me out with the usual, ‘That’s her now,’ at which the pair of them both turned, looked right at me looking at them and giggled like sixty five year old school girls.
I am sure it was only a coincidence that fifteen minutes before that, my landlord had emerged from that back room and left the library. (Of course, he doesn’t do this. I only ‘think’ he gossips about me with other tenants, trades people, at parties and now at the library. Really, I am, as always, just paranoid and delusional) He draws my attention with his patter. He was asking the library employee if she ‘was from here.” (it is part of his structured personable, socialized act, like what’s your sign? used to be)
RT: 1
…is pretty much more of the same of course. But I can never get over the people who can keep right on acting this out the same way, year after year, after year, while consistently failing to make a connection between themselves and their incessant gossiping, and my reporting of all the various versions of it being acted out for me, followed by the denial of it and the claim that all I hear from them, originates within my own mind. It really is mind-boggling and almost impossible to decipher. Yet the system expects children to be able to explain this group phenomenon and if they CAN’T, the fact that they can’t is used as ‘proof’ by the system that it couldn’t have happened.
They never figure out that this circular argument which was invented as the means of the denial of any reality that people don’t like, is the CAUSE of the individual’s confusion in the first place. Even when there is a ton of evidence they cling tightly to their belief that they are ‘hidden’ in plain sight and therefore ‘superior’ to those they decide are unable to see them.
Original post at Meshuggah.net
Yesterday, these two women discussed how I ‘think that ‘he’ wanted to marry me’. I have heard all the same rumors that they have and many more besides, but when they hear them they are rumors and when I hear them they are defined as ‘delusions.’ The SAME stories mind you are given these opposite meanings still.
The other thing they like to do is always credit me as the ‘source’ of the ideas when in fact, I am no more in the story of me than a prop is ‘in’ a staged play.
So. yesterday, these two passed along the latest and one of them even confirmed that for me by pointing me out with the usual, ‘That’s her now,’ at which the pair of them both turned, looked right at me looking at them and giggled like sixty five year old school girls.
I am sure it was only a coincidence that fifteen minutes before that, my landlord had emerged from that back room and left the library. (Of course, he doesn’t do this. I only ‘think’ he gossips about me with other tenants, trades people, at parties and now at the library. Really, I am, as always, just paranoid and delusional) He draws my attention with his patter. He was asking the library employee if she ‘was from here.” (it is part of his structured personable, socialized act, like what’s your sign? used to be)
RT: 1
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